11/08/2013

In the beginning, there was the fringe.

I spend most of my life reading the wonderful words of many a glorious blogger, so I felt that the time was right to give it a bash myself.

Where to start?!? The idea is that this will be a blog where I can post a few of the many photos I take of the happenings around me taking place on a daily basis. Meaning it will be cats, clothes, people, other cats, food and stuff covered in hair from cats. Riveting eh? So, in order to prolong this agony, I'll start with this:

I was born many, many years ago on a cold Winter's morning. As the snow fell, I came into this Earth. Lumpy, yellow yet full of potential, my Mum tells me that most people at least had the diplomacy to blatantly lie to her face in their desire to convince her that I wasn't quite the ugliest thing they had ever seen. I grew fast, to the extent that I was taken back to the doctors with the statement "She's too tall, what's wrong with her?!?" (I assume my mum was hoping that he'd agree and exchange me for a non-faulty child)

My Mum with a small(ish) me. You can see who my fringe-spiration is.
I had a delightful first three years of life, which peaked at the birth of my Sister. I lovingly nicknamed her Tomato, due to the fact that she smelt of tomatoes. (Even now I get a nostalgic waft of it from her) She's a cracking individual, we always said that she got the beauty and I got the brain, alas, she then got the brains too, leaving me with nothing except a superior ability to reach high-up things and bigger boobs.

Tomato and me, circa 1991 - As you can see, fashion for me has always been a "passion"....
I was extremely happy growing up (Don't worry, there are no twists - the happy theme runs throughout) I read many, many books, ate many, many crisps and stayed in the Brownies until they kicked me out for being too old. I'm not going to say anything about my Mum and Dad because they are mortified when I swear on Twitter, meaning that they'd likely disown me for dragging them into this sorry mess (Suffice to say, they are incredible, inspirational, bloody flipping wonderful people)

Secondary school was a freaking terrifying time, I hated it, it was vile - this was where I realised that some people are just straight up dicks: Confidence was never a problem for me, I enjoyed my own company greatly so why the heck wouldn't everyone else?!?!? WELL they didn't. Also, I was just under 6ft tall, wore (and loved) the glasses you see above, had a smashing set of front teeth, reeeaaaaallly liked learning stuff and well then there was the fringe.

I've always loved a fringe, they're bloody brilliant. I have trialled every fringe going and my love has never relinquished. But the fringe at school prompted some fabulous dialogue for me, including:

Mean girl:     "I love your fringe"
Me:              "THANK YOU!!! My Mum's friend cuts it at his hairdressers, he's 
                        really nice and..."
Mean girl:     "HAHAHAHAHAH IT WAS A JOKE - It's gross. and your glasses are
                        shit"
Me:               "Four eyes are better than two"
Mean girl:     "They're not though are they. They just mean your real eyes are
                      shit too."
Me:              "............"

But guess what, I SURVIVED. And I went to university, and I got to DO ME. (That's not a euphemism) I moved to Sheffield and met many other slightly bewildered people, I took a course that meant nothing and passed it (just) and immediately forgot all I learnt. I made some extremely mega friends in this time, and drank a lot, and behaved horrendously and got some glorious memories

I worked in some strange and disturbing jobs, one of which provided me with the most beautiful man that ever there was: Joe

 One of us is never knowingly not on the floor at any one time.
 
Joe and I have had some "Special" times, "The Lost Years" if you will. But I'll tell you more about him one day, there are too many words. Many of these words are bad words which must not be written, but if you want to know more about the insides of him in advance, you can find him HERE
 
Not long after this, I also met my husband.
I didn't like him. He didn't like me. I liked pretentious men who were self-depreciating, with long hair and who could play the guitar. He liked girls who were thin, with shiny hair and who did as they were told.
BUT THEN WE DON'T ALWAYS GET WHAT (We think) WE WANT.
So we met, we circled each other like territorial red bottomed monkeys, we read Grazia together, we stopped actively loathing each other, we got drunk, we got together, we were ashamed of ourselves, we broke up, we made each other cry, we decided to stop being self-centred dicks and give it a proper go. So we did. And it worked.

Check out THIS guy - Picture by the beeeeeeautiful Caro at Carohutchings
He's a bit fabulous my Husband, he's scarily knowledgeable, he adores our families and he loves me more than is appropriate (or understandable) Plus it helps that he's EXTREMELY dishy (Now that I've resigned myself to un-hairy....) We got married three years ago and live a very sensible life with our emotionally ruined cats Gary and Steve. I'm not going to say anything more or I'll have run out of things to ACTUALLY blog about (My life it prrretty uneventful....)
 
So that's me, that's where I am now, it's who I is, it's what I do. I'm quite looking forward to this blogging wotsit.......
 
 

 

3 comments:

  1. I look forward to reading more of the innards of your mind! x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you lovely! You've been extremely instrumental in me giving this a go x

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ahhh! You're in Sheffield; I'm in Sheffield too :-) Look forward to reading your blog!

    ReplyDelete